A jumbled up mind 30 May, 2008

Since I’ve got more time off hand this vacation, I found myself getting uber stress about the release of exam results..since a week ago. It’s like everytime I think about the possibilites of my grades, my mind will automatically flashback to the moment when I was doing my paper and thereafter, imagine how it will feel to just push that magic “login” button on my very own lappie, in the comfort of my bed, to see the results. I often thought of going out of my bedroom to check my results. So that when I do badly, I will not relate the bad memories to my bedroom. The sense of place will change.. See, Geography matters.
And when I get stress over the results (hey, the mounting tension kills ok), I shop more. Yeah, now, I figured maybe it’s just an excuse I came up with to justify my otherwise, unjustifiable shopping. Just like how I think “retail theapy”is some kinda conspiracy theory that some marketing people came up with to sell more products. Cos seriously, when people are upset and succrumb to “retail therapy”, they very often realise they not only continue to feel horrible, but have also burnt a hole in their pockets.
More skirts, more stockings. So I guess next sem’s wardrobe will consist of quite a number of skirts. Which translates to more heels.
And, I sigh a lot more. I felt like I aged with every sigh, but they’re good stree relievers. A little, at least! My sister told me to “stop sighing” though. (Special thanks to Old Catman for the call, at 2am, to hear me sigh.)

And I’m glad it’s over. Let’s bid farewell to Year 2. A year with a pretty steep learning curve that was sometimes painful, very painful but awfully necessary. But it’s nice to think back, look at how far we all have come. Plus, I’m still trying very hard to be a good and disciplined undergrad who does her readings on time.

On a totally irrelevant sidenote, I was all dressed up, choosing which pair of shoes would go well with my outfit. And my dad said, “You going out like that?”
“That” being my grey stockings. Geez, that question made me check myself a few more times before I stepped out on to the streets.

And I know some can’t stand my incessant talk about Mr Sexy Sideburns, but I have to say, I thot I saw him yesterday night, at Clarke Quay. It was a mind trick though.
Just about the time the shadows call,
I undress my mind and dare you to follow.
Paint a portrait of my mystery,
Only close my eyes and you are here with me.
A nameless face to think I see,
To sit and watch the waves with me till they’re gone.
A heart I’d swear I’d recognize is made out of my own devices.
Could I be wrong?

I know, this is all jumbled up. That’s the state of my mind.

Psst. I think I’m happily unemployed-happily filling up my days with tanning sessions(I don’t tan my face cos it causes pre-mature aging. But anyway, these tanning sessions never work out cos of the crazy weather. Plus somehow, I look forward to going home whenever I step on to Sentosa. It makes me sleepy), tuition and sleep. Plus, we may start jamming in July!

Gossip 27 May, 2008

As we all know, Jaslin quit her job, just after 2 days at H’go boss. It’s such an irony, since she has been complaining that she’s jobless and then, when she gets a job (after interview and all), she decided to quit. She’s horrible, I know.

But I heard she realise that she couldn’t make herself work those crazy retails hours in which she worked when people worked, and continue to work, when people are shopping. But she still very mcuh love fashion (a little reward from her short job stint was to carry many many boxes of shoes, and to get to know a student doing Fashion) plus met some really nice people!

Jaslin is this fickle, undisciplined person, isn’t she? I bet she is. I mean, quitting after 2 days ain’t very acceptable..How far can you go in life when you can’t even stay at a job for 2 days?

Now, she spends her days waking up late, without the alarm clock, going for a jog close to noon, reading, and still trying to find more clothes online (while at the same time, matching them with those already in her wadrobe). As far as I understand, she has decided to remain unemployed for quite sometime (besides giving tuition) just to watch the world go by, sleep as much as she wants meet her friends more often, piss her pets (namely, Blackie the 8 years-old rabbit and Kittie, the 8 mths-old cat)off more frequently by talking to them, and bringing them to the park for a walk when the sun is still burning!

What a waste of life. But then again, it’s the holidays, so maybe you can cut her some slack?

I won’t be surprise if she suddenly tells me she just found a new job!

She’s crazy-I know. Maybe I should stop talking to her? Maybe you should stop talking to her too! She’s a bad girl. Some even told me she’s wild!

If I never see your face again, I don’t mind. Cause we have gone much further than I thought we’d get tonight.

If i never see your face again 24 May, 2008

The hottest collaboration, so far.

I saw the preppy-chic shirt and thot of you.

Till again.

Phew part 2 23 May, 2008

I just quit my job. Spare you all the details, for now. Cos I’m shagged and haven’t eaten since 9am.

Psst. I’m so ashamed for having quite a job just after 2 days!

Phew 21 May, 2008

Got myself a job, that would last till my trip to Hokkaido.

At H’go Boss. Which means, I have to wear the same thing everyday. 12 hours a day, no weekends to speak of.

But I’m happy, cos somewhere inside me tells me this is gonna be fun!

All things sexy 20 May, 2008

I’m going to sink into depression if I still continue to be unemployed.
Because my perks of the day have been reduced to being hinged on shopping.

Perk of the day-My package from Victoria’s secret is here. So I thot I can wear my sexy corset and man’s shirt!
Boo of the day-The corset and the shirt need to be sent to the tailor’s since they’re a bit big.
Perk of the day-Had a sexy VS tote included, incentive for spending like a mad woman during the exams. I like it, cos it reads, “Victoria’s Secret, The World’s Sexiest”.

I like all things sexy.

Did I just say that?
I need to be kept constructively occupied. I think this world is filled with crazy people, just don’t keep me involved(I know I’m crazy too, but not as crazy as them).

I’ve got me, myself and I.

Still Dirrty 19 May, 2008

There’s some women out there who talk and stare who never seem to let down their hair,
Like to past judgment, but they’re just scared.
And don’t know what they’re missing, so they better beware.
Cause I still got that nasty in me, still got that dirrty degree.
And if you want some more sexy, still got that freak in me.
Don’t tell me to behave cause I’ll never play that game.
Don’t tell me what to do cause I’ll never be uptight like you.
Don’t look at me that way cause I ain’t never gonna change.
And if you’re talking about my life, you’re only wasting your own time.

Trying to play by the rules is rough cause sooner or later something’s gonna erupt.

Postsecret Sunday 18 May, 2008

So please, learn how to do your dishes.

“With every goodbye, I feel relieved. My life begins again. I learned to love goodbyes.”

I feel like throwing up(ate and laughed too much over dinner).

Psst. I need a job–no more “No office job” policy anymore man.
PsstPsst. K Box soon, anyone? I need to sing!

Couture 18 May, 2008

I was kept up all night on Friday-thinking. About a High waisted animal print mini skirt. I was thinking about how I would match that skirt with a men’s shirt, 2-3 bottons undone, tucked in the mini skirt with white stiletto heel. Go easy on acessories though, we don’t really need them here. My gawd, won’t it be uber sexy?
It’ll up the sexy style notch man! I like animal prints–it’s difficult to match them because it can make you look like a streetwalker, or tarty, very easily. On the other hand, I think animal prints can be classy and sexy too. Of cos, no real fur please, I love animals way too much. Think the likes of Roberto Cavalli!

Yes, that can keep me excited all night.

And I just have to share this with you.

One of the sexiest songs from Beyonce! Plus, I love her dress and her hair. Yum.

Let’s count down to the opening of SaTC!

Time at hand 16 May, 2008

I’m staring into the immeasurable blackness that streches far beyond my closed eyelids. Though I lie still on the ground, I feel perched at the highest point I could possibly be; clutching at a sat in the night sky with my legs dangling above the cold black nothingness. I take one last look at my fingers wrapped abround the light and let go. Down I go, falling, then floating, then falling again, I wait for the land of my life.

My heart is the only part of me that cares, the only part that ever cared. It fights to pump the blood around to heal, to replace what I’m losing.

Rushing, Rushing, Rushing.
We are always rushing. Why do we bother rushing into things when we should slow down and enjoy the moments that fleet pass?

With time at hand, I sub-consciously create trouble for myself, more to think about, more to worry about. Then, attempt to clean up the emotion mess, which kills.

I would rather go to school than engage in part-time jobs that don’t fufil me. I would rather be alone than be at meaningless social engagements.
What irony…