They say

Every one tells me, “Take it easy, it’s your birthday.”

We all know it’s not about me, it’s about you. I’m not complaining, but it’s taking a toll.

The venue,

The theme,

The invitation letter,

The menu selection,

The table pieces,

The table arrangement,

The seating arrangements,

The gifts,

The music,

The name tags.

How I want everything to be close to perfection. Trust me, I want it to be good, much more than anyone else.

It might have been easy, if I wasn’t the one doing everything, but I am. And I want to. It’s suppose to be a tribute. I’m suppose to be independent.

But I need a little more understanding.

And I didn’t think I should have to spell it out.

————————————

I’ll be good. Just don’t mess around with me now.

Wishlist?

I’ve been asked to put up one. And I always thot I would. Till now, that is. Sitting in front of the computer, trying to think of what I want ain’t the easiest thing to do. Somehow, it feels like I’m demanding for it.

But at the same time, I know it’s troublesome to rack you brains to think of what I “want”.

Well, if you still don’t know me well enough,

1) I like all things sexy.

2) I ain’t that kinda girl who goes crazy for baby pink/blue, sweet, fluffy, dainty. I’ll go crazy if you give me something too girly.

3) I don’t think givin vouchers are insincere. I like it that I can get to shop for my own present! Psst, Tang’s is good!

Really, if you wanna make me one very happy Birthday girl, bring me Mr Sexy Sideburns.

Psst. You have one week to find out who he is, exactly, and locate him for me! I love surprises!

Hokkaido

Finally, I’ve gotten down to uploading the crazy amount of pictures. Trust me, uploading them is the last thing I would like to do cos they took me 2 hours! To tag them and classify them. But then again, looking back at the pictures really makes me miss the place. Yea, already.

Be warned, this is freaking picture-intensive!

At Lawson (like 7-11, but much more interesting. Oh, they sell porn too!), we found some interesting bread.

Shaped like a fish!

This one is amusing! Like a banana!

We went to the Northern Horse Park. I realise that horses has really sexy legs(ok, I know they’re not called legs, are they?) Plus the tight ass! Pardon my laguage!

I found this extremely cute. But I ain’t that kinda “soft-toy” girl. In fact, I find them quite annoying sometimes. Maybe bacause I have over 20 on my bed, thanks to my younger sister.

I love Azuki!

Bread modelled after the icon below.

Types of Kit Kat I bought. They are more of cos. But I figured I can’t be spending all my money buying them, esp since I don’t like eating them.

Hairy Crab!

They have the Mont Blanc flavor! Now, how about us?

Japanese yogurt wiith orange for breakfast.

My sister’s fave-cherry tomatoes with asparagus

Mont Blan from Node 43. I love the combination of liquor and chestnut. 

Off we went to the Shrine Festival at Sapporo. 

Potatoes

The couple was trying to catch terappins for their son.

Yummy! Fish Sausage.

Bananas all dressed up to impress.

Sugar-coated strawberries.

More sexy bananas.

Off to the Ramen Alley! The ramen soup in Saporro is Miso-based.

One man show.

We had dinner at this BBQ restuarant. The seafood is so feash, they cook it without any use of seasoning and oil.

Pretty walls.

Streets of Saporro.

This year’s G8 summit will be held in Hokkaido’s Toyako. The countdown at the old Government house in Sapporo.

A peek into the Old Government House.

Nightview of the Saporro TV Tower.

Shopping time!

Coach Factory. Haha, Coach in Singapore is grossly over-priced!

And then….

Yes! Vivenienne Westwood! She even has a make-up line!

The North Annupuri Resort managed by JAL. 

I love this place! Look at the floor. I think this place is uber sexy.

Stawberry picking! Ya, I didn’t take pictures of myself, so pictures with me in it usually shows either my side or back.

This dog is naughty. He tried to bite!

I love strawberries! We picked them out and then just put them in out mouths. No washing! Cos the owner said it’s very clean. It’s a eat-all-you-can strawberry session for an hour. Of cos, we all left before the hour was up.

Ishiya Factory. Which produces the popular Shiroi Koibito.

Exterior of factory

Garden

The beautiful stairway in the factory.

Cakes!

And of cos we had to try their version of Mont Blanc.

Next up, Otaru!

The map our tour guide Michiko san drew.

River bank in Black and White, and Sepia.

The famous Sushi shop in Otaru!

The owner of the shop(centre).

When you go to Otaru, you have to go to Le Tao!

Le Tao’s Mont Blan!

 

The famous cheesecake from Le Tao.

Chocolate structures in Le Tao.

Then, we went cycling in the rain!

My grandma giving the leader who brought us cycling around a Hi5! yea, if you’re thinking my grandma is happening, she is!

The tedious climb up the cape of sea of Japan.

My sister takes funny pictures. I was trying to lookin at the deep blue waters and covering my eyes from the intense wind at the same time.

That’s me again! yea, I put up my hoodie..cos I didn’t want my hair to be messed by the string winds. Even at the cape, you never know who’s watching.

Hokodate!

Nightview from Mt Hakodate! I took it while dining at a restuarant which serves fusion food. Bad food, good view.

We were shopping at the waterfront of Hakodate

Exhibition promoting world peace.

This boy is soooo cute. So much so that I asked his dad if I can take a picture of him.

 

Warehouses converted into exhibition halls or cafes.

Squid Ink ice-cream. I love it, cos it’s salty and sweet!

i was trying to get the belt used when wearing a Kimono. And my sister was suppose to snap the steps needed to wear it (trust me, its difficult when it’s more than 3m long). Instead, she seem to have taken just the final product!

This is the Algae of Hokkaido. Suppose to be a male, here, he’s dressed up as a woman.

Convent.

Street of Rural area.

Ok, I’m tried.

I’ve just gotten an email from the Dean’s office with regards to my application for the mentorship programme. Good news. So I’m waiting, to see who my mentor is! Exciting eh!

Psst. The theme for my 21st will be sent out soon. Sorry for the delay!

6.10

Am back from Hokkaido, just to realise that my lappie crashed(just when I thot things couldn’t get any worse). So here I am, trying to use the desktop which I haven’t touched for the past 3 years.

It’s 6 in the morning and it’s back to work today. Without Fe (Hope you’re enjoying TW!)

It was an enriching trip to Hokkaido(even though I’ve been there just last June)..

Jogging around the old Government House in Sapporo, while people watching the people decked in their power suits on their way to work. 

Climbing up the cape along the Sea of Japan (trust me, it was really a calorie buring session that also helps tone the butt and tests your ability to hold on to your bag before it flies into the sea due to the strong winds).

Water rafting along the river while bird watching and studying the various volcanoes surrounding us.  It was made more exciting when we engaged in water wars saw the team spirit grew in just a mere hour.

To eat like crazy and not feel guilty. I mean why should I? I’m on holiday, (I think) I jog pretty religiously, and there was not tipping on the scale. Ate 3 kinds of Mont Blanc(those from Node 43 at Sapporo Grand Hotel were magnificant! The generous amount of liquor is enough to win me over), the kelp, and Squid ink ice cream, the Le tao Cheesecake, Snaffles cheesecake, Royce chocs, Le Tao’s chocs…the various fresh seafood and tonnes of others.

To be able to go back to Otaru River. On of the most romantic places in Hokkaido, in my opinion. Looking at the artists along the river banks, the slower pace of life..the perfect setting for falling in love.

Kit Kats. I bought only 7 types. Trust me, there are many more I din’t manage to buy. Those in Tokyo are so different from those in Hokkaido. Plus within various parts of Hokkaido, there’re varities too.

The breath-taking night view from Mt Hakodate…

The 5 storey Daiso..

The over-whelming number of school girls wearing Falsies..

The less than desirable service on SQ. (Tsk Tsk.)

I haven’t got time to post up pictures, or talk about the trip in greater depth.

But at six in the morning, that’s all I’ve got to say.

And to those who helped me get over the demise of Blackie, in the form of comments here, emails, or smses, Thank you. Words can’t express my gratitude. I’m better, besides the more than ocassional urge to look at the cage or to want to feed my bread or fruits to her.

If I didn’t want it then, I don’t see why I would want it now.

Blackie: 2000-2008

I am typing from Niseko, Hokkaido.

Was having a walk after dinner. Just read an email from mummy.

Blackie passed away.

8 wonderful years she spent with me. Now she’s gone.

It is horrible having to receive the news via email, to know that I was not by her side.

As I am typing, tears roll down my face. But I dont really care. I must say it will be one of my regrets in life, that I was not with her to see her through her final moments..I cannot imagine that she might went through it all alone.

It is painful to know I do know even know the details yet. As much as I know, mummy said she was not sick. And that she left without pain.

It is heartbreaking to know that she spent the last 8 years with me, but when I am back, she would not be anymore.

The empty blue cage. No final goodbye.

I will miss you Blackie. Always

 

Warwick Avenue

Her eyes. The words. The simplicity of the video.

Don’t think we’re okay, just because I’m here. You hurt me bad, but I won’t shed a tear.
I’m leaving you for the last time, baby.

You think you’re loving but you don’t love me.

Ex and the city: Same lover in different forms

And then I wondered, do we always love the same way?
I felt a tinge of disgust, thinking about people who love their lovers, regardless past or present, in the very same way.

Isnt it a mere form of substitution then?
When Carrie and Mr Big’s relationship failed (in season 2), she was told she has been dating the wrong men-men who tortures her feelings, hard to tie down, almost impossible to make a commitment to. All wrong.
So, are we dating the same people, over and over again, just in different forms?..Simply because, we’re attracted to certain types of people, with the kind of “ideal” qualities we get fatally attracted to?

The same style of pursue, the similar words uttered, the same form of what constitues romance.
Maybe we’re just searching for someone willing to put on the mask we want them to wear.

Do we love, to satisfy ourselves?
If so, then the notion of “love” has to be redefined in my dictionary. For the last time I checked, I interpreted “love” not to be this way.

I think my heart just frozen. Again.

Not very surprising. It takes a lot for me to thaw anyway.

It’s hard to come clean.