Guilt

I feel guilty.
At the look and the mention of your name.
And the feelings I’m not suppose to have.
Not.
Because of who you are.

Dang. What’s wrong with me?

I’m a bad bad girl. And I like to cross the lines. That’s why.

Random, superificial musings

After the exams,
I intend to dye my hair black.
And go get me some bright devil red lipstick complete with classic pin-up eyes.

I can’t wait.
Though I will still have to think about the hair colour.
Cos I’m loving hazel brown too.

6 more months to be crazy… that’s if I don’t find a job I like, and end up in a boring office. Or you know…

Speechless/edited/

Listening to Lady Gaga’s Speechless at 4 in the morning made me feel a little emotional…
I looked around, the silent surrounding.
It feels oh-so-good to be emotionally stimulated.
Perhaps, I’ve been running on deficit emotionally for a long time..so long that I needed to feel a little sourceless heartache.

The ideal amount of pain that makes you reminisce about events and emotions, but not the person. The good amount of pain with no one to point a finger at. Just the way I like it.

You popped my heart’s seams and burst my bubble dreams..
I’ll never write a song, Won’t even sing along. I’ll never love again cos you left me speechless..

Time to get back to eco-d. And did I mention that my gastric is killing me? And I love that December is coming, but I’ll leave that to later.

I had enough of assignments, cap-talks, exams. for now.

Push the button

3 down, 2 more to go.
But I’m damn drained already. All I want to do is sleep.

More discipline baby.
No pain, no gain.

Whatever I do, don’t look back.

I’m full from lunch, and it’s too hot to jog now. So I’ll probably be unhealthy and indulgent…by lying in bed first.

From The Sartorialist

I love the fact that elder women in the mediterranean countries maintain their traditional elegance and still take their time to dress up and put their best jewels on and the best coat they have and go on a walk with their husbands, girlfriends, dogs, cats.. for a show-off and don’t abandon themselves because of the years.”

–a reader’s comment on “On the Street….Enriqueta Cosculluel, Barcelona” (23rd Nov, 2009)

Haunted

I’m officially haunted. By a very persistent ghost — the exams.

There I was, lying on the bed full of readings (about the philosophy of Physical Geography, mind you!) and I slowly fell asleep. Or so I thought…

Until I got reminded of the exam I sat for earlier..and my little brain decided to come up with alternative answers in my sleep.
So much for quality rest.

And nope, this is not the first time this happened.
Just today morning (or rather, yesterday morning), I woke up before the alarm got off at 4.30am cos my subconscious mind decided to do a little debate about “scales”, which made me jump out of bed, almost literally.

I’m not overtly worried about the lack of sleep actually.
I’m more concern about the possible pending dark eye circles and fine lines.

Hand me the eye cream. now.
or somebody’s gonna get hurt.
ok. not funny.
I’m rambling..which is not surprising right.

Just before the exams today, I grabbed my hair and proclaimed, “Why don’t he not ask us about the philosophical strands and all..why don’t he ask us about shoes and bags and clothes!?!”
and when I was offered muffins, I stupidly said, “I can’t eat, I feel like vomiting..and since I have butterflies in my stomach, I may be vomiting flying butterflies”.
That was when my friend looked around and said, “She’s going crazy..”

Oh yes. I agree.

P.s. I just came up with a question about fashion.
“With reference to a fashion icon/item in the post-world war two period, explain how the significance of that particular era influenced and shaped the emergence of that fashion icon/item.”
I fantasize about having such questions during exams (I will approach the question with reference to the 2.55 and how it has feminist underpinnings in its creation).. see, I told you fashion is far from frivolous.

And i think that mean i’m this close to crazy.

Some 1000 awesome things. again.

#629 When it feels like the lyrics to the song you’re listening to were written just for you.

Music is the food for my soul.

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